January 2012
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Senegal Braces For Protest →
Here we go…
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A Very Northern New Year
After travelling for close to 17 hours, my car pulled over and let me off at a very quiet Ndioum intersection. It didn’t stay quiet for long (due to the loud uncreative swearing) because I immediately stepped on 4 or 5 thorny plant things that seem to be generously sprinkled across the entirety of Ndioum. And with my new foot piercings I hobbled to the regional house and passed out.
...
So here's the thing...
I’ve been travelling for the past few weeks and haven’t had time to update you. Whoopsy. And here’s the other thing. My camera is M.I.A., which is incredibly sad for me because there have been some really great drunken portraits of indoor gingerbread house baseball photo ops. Soooooo, to resolve the issue, I’ve resorted to stealing using pictures from my friends blogs and...
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December 2011
12 posts
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A Conversation in French (Bakel Eye Clinic)
(A fancy looking lady comes to get her eyes checked. Evan's finishing up her exam.)
Evan: Now what's this here?
Fancy Lady: A hand.
Evan: What's this here?
Fancy Lady: A star.
Me: Good.
Fancy Lady: Actually, I have a problem with my phone. (Some inaudible French, something about her phone) Understand?
Me: Hey Spence, Jillian, come here. (At Fancy Lady now) Explain to them what you just told me.
Fancy Lady: Well. Sometimes. When I'm looking at my phone, I see 3 bars. But really...REALLY...there are only 2 bars.
Spence/Jillian: What?
Fancy Lady: The bars on my phone. Sometimes I think it says 3 bars, but it's really 2 bars. I don't know how much service I have.
Spence/Jillian: So,...you want glasses so you can see how many bars are on your phone?
Evan: You have 20/20 vision.
Fancy Lady: Yes. But I need the glasses.
Evan: No, they're not necessary. Your eyes are perfect.
Fancy Lady: It's for reading.
Me: Your eyes are perfect.
Fancy Lady: I would like the glasses.
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December 19, 2011 (Jeremiah Was A Bullfrog)
“Are you going to tell us a real update, or just show us more pictures?” -Anonymous
This was in my inbox this morning. Fantastic. Maybe my laziness has finally caught up to me…hmm…nope. Some people (me), don’t like reading things longer than it takes me to shit. Sooooooo, with that said. Here’s a real update!
We just got back from Bakel, the far north east...
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The Global Garden: A drought-tolerant tree called... →
Moringa is awesome. Get on it America.
November 2011
10 posts
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Compliments
(Sitting next to Spence. He looks at my hair and touches it.)
Spence: Your hair reminds me of a dog I knew. I called him "Toothbrush."
Marie: ...if there ever was a compliment.
Me: Yeah, fuck you Spence.
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Anonymous asked: do you exercise in senegal? -ambo
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Pulaar Proverbs (My Favorites)
Baasal warataa kono na tampina
Poverty does not kill but makes one tired
***
Si bahe cumɗi gooto fof ñifata ko waare mum
If the beards are all on fire, each person must put out his own beard
***
ɓe nengasa ɓe ne nguuba yaajay kono luggidtaa
If some are digging and some are burying it will be wide but never deep
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Mawɗo ina jooɗoo yi'ii cukalel ɗaroo roŋku yi'ude
A seated elder sees what a standing child misses
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October 2011
4 posts
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October 16, 2011 (No Regrets, Just Love)
Ice cubes. Lots of fucking ice cubes. Toss them in a cup of water, wait a minute, don’t jump the gun, then let that sweet juice splash the back of your throat, and slowly trickle and settle at the bottom of your stomach. Let it fill the void, let it calm the madness, let it open up the gates to heaven, let it release you from whatever hellish fever dream you had last night. Oh to have ice...
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“What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us; what we have done for others...”
– Albert Pike
September 2011
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August 2011
13 posts
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“It´s not the dress that´s making you look fat. It´s your fat that´s making you...”
– Kumhar (Jessica´s friend)
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“(Puts on my reading glasses) If I wore these everyday, I. Wouldn’t. Do....”
– Hailey
***My eyesight is questionable.
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August 12, 2011 (A Swede In Senegal)
One week. 7 days. However many hours. I don’t want to do the math…I know it’s not hard. 7 x 24, right? Well, whatever that is. I really don’t like using the calculator on this netbook. Not that I have to use the calculator on the netbook. I guess I could use a my phone. 168. Phil just yelled it to me from across the room. My friend Martin was here for 168 hours, give or...
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A Conversation in Pulaar (Tourist)
(Ngor beach, with Martin & Jessica)
Rasta man: Hello my friend.
Me: Hello.
Rasta man: Would you like to buy something?
Me: No, thanks though.
Rasta man: Well, welcome to Senegal!
Me: Aww, thanks, but I live in Senegal right now. I work in Tamba, for the last 17 months actually. I'm not a tourist. I'm just here to relax.
Rasta man: Welcome to Dakar!
Me: Oh thanks again, but I've been to Dakar too.
Rasta man: (Starts pulling out rattle like instruments) Welcome to the beach!
Me: (Internal monologue: Oh shit, he's going to play them...) Seriously, thank you, but I've been to this beach before. And I don't think we want to buy anything right now. (Man starts shaking rattles) Please stop...
Rasta man: (Now singing): Welcome, welcome, welcome. Welcome to Senegal. Welcome to Africa. Welcome, welcome, welcome.
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WatchGood Afternoon Afia Seno.
Sorry for the shaky camera. Also, my first out of country visitor, Martin, makes an appearance.
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“We are Amerrri-cans too. We speak verrry well English.”
– Drunk French girls at Liquor de Warang.
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A Conversation in Pulaar (Donkey)
Diariso: Welcome to the forest.
Me: Thanks.
Diariso: (Walks further, looks around)
Me: So...you scared of the hyenas?
Diariso: Hyenas?
Me: Yeah, you scared of the hyenas? The ones that laugh.
Diariso: There aren't any hyenas here.
Me: Well...
Diariso: There aren't any hyenas here. But have you heard of a forest donkey?
Me: What?
Diariso: You don't understand?
Me: No, I understand...
Diariso: A forest donkey.
Me: A forest donk---
Diariso: It's a donkey that is in the forest. (Walks away)
July 2011
6 posts
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WatchGet it on the floor. Get it, get it on the floor.
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